I noticed that I have not fully explained my love for McMedic.....Here goes!!
I can still remember the day I decided that I was going to marry McMedic. As strange as it sounds to people that are not in the medical field, it happened after he had brought an extremely critical patient into my ER via his ambulance. There is something very attractive about the sight of a man trying his hardest to save someone's life. I had talked to him before but I hadn't really had a long conversation with him before that day. After delivering that patient to us it took a while for him to decompress and get his things gathered and ready for him to go back on the road. So he talked to me and the woman I was working with and I definitely remember getting my first hug from him that day after he thought one of my male co-workers with really long hair was an attractive woman. That was when he decided that he needed a woman's hug and he hugged me. That day, I was in love.
Since then we have had a bunch of fun times together and I really do consider him a good friend. There were many nights where I went out drinking after work and then stopped by his work for some laughs which eventually ended up with the "No Visitors" policy being implemented for him. There was the night where he said he was not coming to the bar to meet me and Meredith so I wore sweats, glasses and didn't do my hair and then he showed up with his sidekick and completely embarrassed me. That was also the night that I'm pretty sure he knew I was extremely interested in him but he was clearly more interested in Meredith, or just trying to ignore me that night.
My fav night though would have to be the night of Meredith's 21st birthday when he and I were the oldest people at the party. It started when he told me he was running late and not sure if he would make it out and then I looked up at the door of the bar and saw him coming in and looking around for us. Of course I pretended not to see him until he called me and asked where we were sitting. After he had said hi to all of us he stood behind me and I tried desperately not to move because he had his hand resting on the back of my stool but his hand was also gently touching my back for quite a while during our conversation.
Later that night, when we had closed the bar, we decided to head to a friend of mine's house and that was when McMedic was ready to save the day for me. Admittedly I was intoxicated while I was leading the caravan to the party. Meredith and one of her friends was following another friend of ours and McMedic was following me. Not far from the bar we had left, I got pulled over for speeding and should have in all honesty gotten a DUI that night. Instead of McMedic speeding away, because he had been drinking too, he stayed close by and was ready to jump to my rescue if the police had decided to get me out of the car. Fortunately, the officer who pulled me over knew me and knew that although I had been drinking, speeding was the only problem in the car. Long story short we went to the party after the police left and continued to have fun at my friend's house and then at my house after we all got thrown out of the first house. I can still remember him stomping up and down my steps and carrying the beer out of the basement for us.
He really is such a fun guy. The only problem that we run in to is the fact that he doesn't want kids. Which I completely understand but kids are something that I really want to have and that is really important to me. So we'll see how things progress but I know right now I don't have the guts to bring it up to him!
Thursday, October 2, 2008
New Boy
Clearly all of those stories below show that I need to break up with the New Boy. It really sucks but I just keep reminding myself that the night he met me, he was waiting for another girl to show up and she didn't so he turned his attention to me. Whether I'm right or not I think he'll be just fine moving on from me, but I just have never had to do this before. I've never had the power in a relationship like this. And my pocket is ringing with a new phone number, starting with his area code...Did the man finally get a phone? That would be special.
I just keep flipping back and forth about what to do with him. On one hand I really do like him as a person but in reality I don't know what kind of person he is yet. And my gut instinct about him was that he was the kind of person who is always waiting for that big job that is coming up and the type of person that lives from day to day just getting by with the help of magical strokes of luck. I don't necessarily want to be in a relationship where I never know what circumstances of life are going to change in a given day.
I want a man like McMedic, I don't need to have a million dollars in the bank but I would like to not have to count pennies in order to have fun and go out from time to time. Also, I don't mind working hard and saving up to have the chance to go away and have a blast of a vacation. Traveling and seeing things that I've never seen before is one of my favorite things to do and one of the things that I like the most about McMedic and other people that I used to work with. They had the same kind of attitude that I do. I would rather work 24/7 for a while to earn money to get what I want rather than take it easy and wait for things to come to me. I'm all about the delayed gratitude.
I know that when I get my stuff together I will be able to do the things that I want and I will be able to see things that many other people don't get to see because I am willing to give up things now to have more in the end. I just don't think I know New Boy well enough to decide if he is that type of person yet. But then again I'm also not sure that there is any other man in my life (as of now) that would fit the description of what I want. The decision now is whether I should ride this thing out with New Boy and get the chance to know him better. Who knows, at this point I've just confused myself more about what I should and shouldn't do to give both myself and him a fair chance. But something tells me that going with your gut instinct usually is your best option.
I just keep flipping back and forth about what to do with him. On one hand I really do like him as a person but in reality I don't know what kind of person he is yet. And my gut instinct about him was that he was the kind of person who is always waiting for that big job that is coming up and the type of person that lives from day to day just getting by with the help of magical strokes of luck. I don't necessarily want to be in a relationship where I never know what circumstances of life are going to change in a given day.
I want a man like McMedic, I don't need to have a million dollars in the bank but I would like to not have to count pennies in order to have fun and go out from time to time. Also, I don't mind working hard and saving up to have the chance to go away and have a blast of a vacation. Traveling and seeing things that I've never seen before is one of my favorite things to do and one of the things that I like the most about McMedic and other people that I used to work with. They had the same kind of attitude that I do. I would rather work 24/7 for a while to earn money to get what I want rather than take it easy and wait for things to come to me. I'm all about the delayed gratitude.
I know that when I get my stuff together I will be able to do the things that I want and I will be able to see things that many other people don't get to see because I am willing to give up things now to have more in the end. I just don't think I know New Boy well enough to decide if he is that type of person yet. But then again I'm also not sure that there is any other man in my life (as of now) that would fit the description of what I want. The decision now is whether I should ride this thing out with New Boy and get the chance to know him better. Who knows, at this point I've just confused myself more about what I should and shouldn't do to give both myself and him a fair chance. But something tells me that going with your gut instinct usually is your best option.
Yeah, I May Have a Problem
I cannot have a normal night out... Me going to a bar is clearly never the best idea but anyway, it was a birthday, I had to go.
The night started with my friends playing a joke on me by telling me the Birthday Girl couldn't make it out, which really made all my running around after work pointless. So as I was standing outside the first bar of the night yelling at them for tricking me, I happened to look into the bar to see if there were a bunch of people or not. Most of the bar was empty but I did notice a good sized group in the one corner near the video games, also the area where McDirty and I sat a while back at one of his work functions.... O wait, someone over there looks very familiar. Now I do remember when I texted McDirty earlier in the day he did say that he couldn't come out because he had a work thing that night.... O yea, that's him sitting at the bar and now I'm forced to stand outside in the cold until my friends get there because I am NOT ok with walking in there and sitting down by myself with him there. He'd probably think I was stalking him.
So of course, once the girls got there, we walked in and since the bar was not that crowded he saw me automatically. But, luckily, we both pretended not to see each other as I quickly scanned to see if his girlfriend was sitting with them. Even more luckily she was not. Whew!! Anyway, we were there for about an hour and we ignored each other but of course when we left I quickly texted him to tease him about us being there at the same time. Once again, he amazed me with how quick he responded to my messages. Two years ago he wouldn't have said anything until the next time I saw him but o well, I shouldn't worry about it. It means nothing.
Next bar, next drama....So shortly after we sat down at the second bar, a much more casual, laid-back, hole in the wall bar a set of arms wraps around my shoulder as I'm sitting at the bar with my Jack and Coke. Automatically I have no idea who this is and fear comes across my friends faces. I turned and realized that it was a cop friend of mine, and I use the term friend loosely because he is basically old enough to be my father, if not my grandfather. Anyway he proceeds to hit on me for about half an hour at least and my friends are having a blast laughing at me and making jokes. Finally he leaves but not after stealing my phone number, which, I really don't mind because since he called me three times last night I now have his and he could be a valuable resource in getting my butt out of trouble some time. But clearly the creepy vibes I've been getting from him since I met him were warranted because he definitely tried to work come magic last night. Tried being the key word.
Third and final bar of the night..... So after a phone incident with JerkFace's girlfriend getting called because our names are so similar in the phone, she accidentally got a call and got called my name...which just so you know makes me laugh...HARD. Anywho, there was little drama at this bar but I did get to talk to my husband, the only one that I think I might actually have a chance with, probably because he's the only one that I actually know in real life. He called and we talked for about ten minutes and he told me that he won't be in town for my birthday but we will go out after to make up for it. Honestly, he really meant that the group of us would go out, clearly he did not mean for it to be the two of us. I wish!!!
Since by that point I was well on my way to being delirious from my lack of sleep and the beverages I had been downing, I decided this was the time to tell Maria that I really want to marry him and I was forcing her to answer the dreaded "Do you think I have a chance?" question. Bless her and her honesty because her (drunken) response was "I don't know." And that seemed to put things into perspective...Thankfully I didn't follow her advice and go ahead and ask him last night.. We'll save that embarrassment for another night.
The night started with my friends playing a joke on me by telling me the Birthday Girl couldn't make it out, which really made all my running around after work pointless. So as I was standing outside the first bar of the night yelling at them for tricking me, I happened to look into the bar to see if there were a bunch of people or not. Most of the bar was empty but I did notice a good sized group in the one corner near the video games, also the area where McDirty and I sat a while back at one of his work functions.... O wait, someone over there looks very familiar. Now I do remember when I texted McDirty earlier in the day he did say that he couldn't come out because he had a work thing that night.... O yea, that's him sitting at the bar and now I'm forced to stand outside in the cold until my friends get there because I am NOT ok with walking in there and sitting down by myself with him there. He'd probably think I was stalking him.
So of course, once the girls got there, we walked in and since the bar was not that crowded he saw me automatically. But, luckily, we both pretended not to see each other as I quickly scanned to see if his girlfriend was sitting with them. Even more luckily she was not. Whew!! Anyway, we were there for about an hour and we ignored each other but of course when we left I quickly texted him to tease him about us being there at the same time. Once again, he amazed me with how quick he responded to my messages. Two years ago he wouldn't have said anything until the next time I saw him but o well, I shouldn't worry about it. It means nothing.
Next bar, next drama....So shortly after we sat down at the second bar, a much more casual, laid-back, hole in the wall bar a set of arms wraps around my shoulder as I'm sitting at the bar with my Jack and Coke. Automatically I have no idea who this is and fear comes across my friends faces. I turned and realized that it was a cop friend of mine, and I use the term friend loosely because he is basically old enough to be my father, if not my grandfather. Anyway he proceeds to hit on me for about half an hour at least and my friends are having a blast laughing at me and making jokes. Finally he leaves but not after stealing my phone number, which, I really don't mind because since he called me three times last night I now have his and he could be a valuable resource in getting my butt out of trouble some time. But clearly the creepy vibes I've been getting from him since I met him were warranted because he definitely tried to work come magic last night. Tried being the key word.
Third and final bar of the night..... So after a phone incident with JerkFace's girlfriend getting called because our names are so similar in the phone, she accidentally got a call and got called my name...which just so you know makes me laugh...HARD. Anywho, there was little drama at this bar but I did get to talk to my husband, the only one that I think I might actually have a chance with, probably because he's the only one that I actually know in real life. He called and we talked for about ten minutes and he told me that he won't be in town for my birthday but we will go out after to make up for it. Honestly, he really meant that the group of us would go out, clearly he did not mean for it to be the two of us. I wish!!!
Since by that point I was well on my way to being delirious from my lack of sleep and the beverages I had been downing, I decided this was the time to tell Maria that I really want to marry him and I was forcing her to answer the dreaded "Do you think I have a chance?" question. Bless her and her honesty because her (drunken) response was "I don't know." And that seemed to put things into perspective...Thankfully I didn't follow her advice and go ahead and ask him last night.. We'll save that embarrassment for another night.
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